I woke up Saturday morning at 7am in a different house, after only going to bed at 5am.

I had went out the night before at the invitation of an old high school friend that I hadn't seen in three years. I saw some old faces, some new ones.

We drank. We laughed. We lamented the passage of time, the people who weren't there. We drank some more. We hugged. We went to a shitty bar. We went to another shitty bar. We went to a bar that wasn't so bad. We got some pizza because Alec hadn't eaten anything but Jackie got a gyro and now he was hungry as fuck. We took ubers home because it was 3am and we were drunk and Alan was throwing up already.

I had fun. I got to spend time with people I care about but don't see often. I made a new friend. Her name's Kate. She even complimented my outfit and bought me a drink. I saw Alan again, the platonic love of my younger years. I sat by as he vomited his heart out in to the toilet, just like he wanted. How lucky am I to be there for the people I love.

I woke up Saturday morning at 7am, groggy and slightly annoyed I could not sleep for longer. I heard Kate and Alan giggling next to me. Alan jokingly asked if he should cuddle with me. Kate reminded him about consent. I knew he wouldn't. He didn't. I got up, saying "I heard all that." We laughed. I couldn't see them, my groggy eyes struggling to paint their faces with the drips of light leaking from the curtains. But from their voices, I could tell they were there.

Most days, I go to sleep alone, wake up alone, then spend the rest of my day reminding myself that I am not alone. But one night, I didn't have to. I slept and awoke to the warm voices of friends loving with all their might. Even if I don't see Alan or Kate for a month or a year or years, I thank them for this night.

Happy Birthday Alan